Kids and Dogs
I’m passionate about a lot of subjects in my life both personally and professionally. This topic of “kids and dogs” is close to my heart for so many reasons. As a dog trainer that is well versed in canine body language (thank you again Sue Sternberg) I don’t think I’m alone when I scroll through Instagram and see the videos and pictures of the interactions between children and dogs. From the toddler using a dog for a pillow, to the 3-year-old riding the great dane like a pony, to the baby learning how to crawl pulling himself up using the dog’s tail, we’ve all seen them. And we think it all goes away when the kiddo turns 3 years of age. Nope I think it’s just beginning. Ugh, it makes me cringe. Who feels me on this…?
By no means am I an expert on this (I’d never identify myself as an “expert” I’ll let Malcolm Gladwell handle this one https://youtu.be/1uB5PUpGzeY). But I do have a bit of knowledge and experience with children and dogs to weigh in on this conversation (refer to my bio for fancy letters). Let’s just start with the simplest example: When I grew up, I learned that when a dog’s tail is wagging it means the dog is happy. Today I know that the tail is just one aspect of how a dog communicates it emotions about a situation or an event. Learning more about canine body language and how to read our dogs is a topic that even the Presidential pup “Major” had to teach us.
As trainers, when we are lucky enough to have that phone inquiry from a family that has a dog, and the owners are pregnant and preparing for the dog and baby to meet and would like our help, it’s a big win. That doesn’t mean that we aren’t as eager to help once baby has come home but we know it’s frequently less stressful on the dog and the new parents when we get a head start. There are endless activities we can begin doing with our dogs that will prepare it for the changes that come when a new baby arrives. This is especially noteworthy if it’s the family’s first baby and the dog’s first exposure to a baby. Sounds, smells, environment, people, movement, schedules, stress levels everything changes and the more we prepare our four-legged friends for these events the easier it is on everyone.
So, what’s the most critical period of child development that we should be most concerned about? All of it! The infant is completely helpless and reliant on the vigilance of his parents. As the toddler continues his developmental stage of “independence”, he is starting to move faster and can be incredibly unpredictable in his movement, both direction and speed. And now he has new sounds to share with the world, with increased volume. He quickly learns that the pitch of his squeal gets a ton of recognition from those around them. (This is reinforcement at its finest!!) As the child continues with their journey navigating the universe, we still must be mindful of the four legged friend that is adjusting to all of these changes. What are the dog’s needs? How can we accommodate his needs and ensure he is comfortable and accepting of this new family norm?
Some may say “phew we made it through the toddler years we are home free, the dog hasn’t bitten anyone, they are coexisting just fine” and then let their guard down. We forget about the 6-12 year olds coming to the house to play soccer, do homework, and whatever else 12 year olds do in today’s world. And all of a sudden, our four legged friend is exposed to a whole new realm of experiences that surpass the baby/toddler stage where parents and adults are most likely to be more present and aware of where the dog is and where the kids are. Don’t misinterpret me here. This is not about shaming parents, pointing fingers and blame, this is about a conversation that I think we can have with families that can save a dog from a trip to the shelter due to “bad behavior”, when all the dog was saying is “hey, I’m kind of uncomfortable with your small hand in my food bowl could you back up”, or “I don’t want you to lay on top of me”. I think this is a great conversation to have with folks and as soon as I learn about a family getting ready for a baby and I know they have a dog(s) I’m diving in to help, and um… not with the baby shower.
For further information about babies and dogs feel free to contact us!!
Below are some additional resources:
https://www.thefamilydog.com/about
https://youtu.be/ABDrhNBwdpk Stop the 77
https://www.familypaws.com Family Paws Parent Education